Flowerly Maua

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I smile recklessly and I love excessively. I live today knowing I have no other day until tomorrow. Now is my moment. Yesterday is gone, tomorrow is a mystery, but today, today is my gift (present).

Thursday, 15 May 2008

Who can beat a woman

I have nothing this week, I'm working on a post which was prompted by a comment I made last week, but for now, look what I stole (I'm not telling where from).

He gave his now ex-wife just 3 days to move out.

She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.

On the second day, she had movers come and collect her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining-room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of Chardonnay.

When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells, dipped in caviar, into the hollow of the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning & mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere.

Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit...repairmen refused to work in the house...the maid quit...finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out, and eventually, even the local realtors refused to return their calls.

Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man, and asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely, and said that she missed her old home terribly, and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back...

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the small was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth...but only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed, and within the hour, his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later, the man and his new girlfriend stood smirking as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home...including the curtain rods.

Moral of the story: Women are not strong enough to fight with men physically, but they know the soft centres, and the pain stings.


threetypesofcrazy said...


A woman scorned. This was funny.

Tandra said...

Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinteresting LOL

Half n Half said...

Me like her! LMAO!

Wanjiku Unlimited said...

uuuuuuuuii! Ati including the curtain rods! They must think they're bewitched when they move the new house. And indeed they are.

Threetypesofcrazy hell hath no fury than a woman scorned!

Nice one Maua.

KK said...

LOL! I'm getting rid of last nights shrimp... and the curtain rods too now that I think about it. Wait... I don't have a wife yet.

Anonymous said...

yeah...as a woman, am loving this!!!!
thank you.

Prettylyf said...

I'm thinking the pain 'stinks' than it stings lol great story

Be silent said...

Ha hah ahah a this is Hooot poor guy

boyfulani said...

as a guy, i feel threatened!

Nubian Queen said...

Haha i like!!!!
Happy womens day...for next year!

Acolyte said...

This is an urban legend. Even I with my dead nose have always been able to find the source of smells...

joyunspeakable said...


woman scorned...what of when you lead us to scorn them....?

anyway the woman was bright...

extravagantgrace said...

LOL hell has no fury like a woman scorned.

ps. i know where you stole this from

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